afterwords:::15:::sides

**Dualities

I am prone to take it all a little too seriously, so when I read something like this quote from Henry James, I forget to whom he addresses his concern. In a manner of negotiating dualities I have to playfully step aside myself and observe how drawn I am to defend my position. Playfulness requires little defensiveness; it’s made of other stuff. So I offer the quote and then smile at my own gullibility. It’s a familiar scarf, wonderful on a cool evening, stangling as I dance though the woods.


“When one turns to the magnificent edifice of the physical sciences, and one sees how it was reared: what thousands of disinterested moral lives of men lie buried in its mere foundations: what patience and postponement, what choking down of preference, what submission to the icy laws of outer fact are wrought into its very stones and mortar: how absolutely impersonal it stands in its vast augustness-then how besotted and contemptible seems every little sentimentalist who comes blowing his voluntary smoke wreaths, and pretending to decide things from out of his private dream!”

He casts scientific activities out of the realm of play, and yet dining with scientists and hearing them talk about the process they deeply enjoy, they reveal threads of play. So an eleventh assumption sets play opposed to work, separating them.

As long as we maintain dualities of play and work or serious and silly we will forever be critical of one at the expense of the other and lose out on the benefit of each. The assumption of this duality that we reinforce erodes the value inherent in human creativity. Some opposites we learn create false dualities.


Our culture tends to define things in terms of dualities and will create them where they don’t exist and teach us to accept them. We teach that work represents responsible behavior while play represents irresponsible behavior. Play wastes time while work accounts for our time. Play becomes some illegitimate stepchild of work. Upon closer inspection, work might represent the cardboard version of play. Work mocks up, while play serves up the real thing. Play represents an irresistible irrepressible avenue of possibility that we haven’t yet fully entertained. Negative descriptions of play dissuade us as children from continuing to exercise our imagination to solve problems facing us. Far too quickly we get caught up in the right answers and the only way to do things. So what approximates truth?



When we consider the work play duality, we realize that it brainwashes us to accept that we would give up play and assume work as our proper activity to make life meaningful. If, however, we release the play work duality, the words lose some of their power. Play can gain its own seriousness and work can acknowledge some inefficient use of time The ease with which we reconstruct this duality amazes me. Take the most entrenched beliefs about play and work. Dissolve the duality by affirming that play can be an aspect of work and work an aspect of play. The work of some becomes the play of others. It seems obvious that if we could arrange what we do as work to be what draws us into play, we might all engage in activities in a more enjoyable manner.

afterwords:::16:::hanging-out

**Playtime

The twelfth assumption about play focuses attention on our need for a certain amount of playtime to sense we have enough time to play. We teach our self to think of time as standardized and incremental even when our experiences disprove this expectation.

Remember playfulness amplifies the flow of time. A lot can get done and it seems like time stands still, other times nothing happens and the whole afternoon slips by gloriously.

Sometimes the best time to play is when we squeeze it in right before leaving for somewhere else.

And then there is hanging out. Consider the period of time in adolescent development when “hanging out” eclipses active play. Time slows down. Consider hanging out as a subspecies of play and also a subset of rest. Consider it as a period in our development when we sort out complex social connections. During this hanging out time, we integrate much of the socialization imperatives placed in childhood. We deal with profound inconsistencies in our family and community. We mythically prepare for our adult quest and we sadly become convinced that we have to do this next developmental stage without playing, without the benefit of our imaginations, without crucial inner resources (a thirteenth assumption.)

Some people don’t lose play when they hang out. Most of these people get labeled as outsiders in some fashion; called on some level peculiar. Embrace the peculiar; creative reordering resurfaces in everyday activities. Those that have moderate amounts of creativity left can suppress it much of the time, though find with encouragement that it easily returns. Those that have little easily forget that they ever had access to the realm of play and comfortably live without it.

afterwords:::17:::repeats

**Never Repeat Again

Each of our assumptions can turn into an activity that explores the realm of play. Each elaboration can explore an interest we hold. Each time we repeat the process we can either, enjoy the activity as we play it again; or we can examine gently if we experience it the same. Sometimes we choose to develop it further to include something new. Perhaps it happens in this very elaboration on playfulness. In telling this story I elaborate further and further with new details and spontaneous digressions. Like in the story One Thousand and One, um, well, The 500 Hats of Bartholomew Cubbins, each hat becomes more elaborate than the previous one; until finally the hats overwhelm our sensibility.

If we take a story that we like to tell and let it tell itself, ideas will pop up that will elaborate the tale. Follow those and include them in the story. Some will become wonderful additions to the narrative; others will lead to yet new tales that pull memories into the retelling. Some threads will be sloughed off. Again the ninth assumption of not repeating in play serves no purpose.

afterwards:::18:::vantage

** From Another Vantage

Dualities represent a part of perspective. We can alter our perspective playfully in many ways. The ability to view something from another direction or from another dimension allows us to introduce some helpful magic into our world. We play. If we assume we have to stay seated in an assigned row, we may miss the experience. On the other hand a slight movement of the head may alter our perspective completely. Let us not assume that play requires great inconvenience (an fourteenth assumption.) A shift in perspective can simply make what seemed like a mountain of work into a sandbox in which to play. Try it.

afterwrds:::19:::inclusion

**Plays Well with Others

A fifteenth assumption concerns playing with others. When young, many of us would easily or even not so easily ask strangers, other children whom we didn’t know well, if they wanted to play. As we age and feel a sense of embarrassment about our play, we become unable to ask strangers to play with us. Some of us have isolated our playfulness, leaving us as lone players. We hide our play in shadows. We remain slightly uncomfortable with how we play. Most adults will play only with set and familiar rules. We get drawn back into pseudo-play and only get slight personal benefit from play.


Suggestion # w: Rules for Inclusion

Consider what would be required to include others in play activity. Call this an inclusion strategy. Consider what they will need to know to join. Make notes. Some limitations require clarification along the way so that we maintain our intent. Perspectives may need clarification to successfully communicate them. And also give others a chance to lead toward the unexpected.

aftrwrds:::20:::participate

**Play Matters

So what do we really mean by play. It clearly varies widely from individual to individual. For some of us it introduces more order into our lives. For others of us it opens up certain avenues to freedom. Play operates a dynamic where stimulation flows and occurs at a pace, which we sense as pleasurable. Therefore, it can calm or stimulate, depending on the person and the setting. Consistently, play keeps us in a state of mind where a high probability of a novel response exists after some set of repetitions. If many things occur, some pattern will sort actions in a way to temporarily limit the chaos. The actual play occurs as a sorting principle that applies to the elements in the process, rather than when the process finishes. Whatever action has been engaged in for the outcome, the action represents play, while the outcome, although desired, serves as the token of the play having taken place.

I think many of us would be far more willing to play, if we fully believed that the outcome represented a mere byproduct of the intention rather than the proof of the intention, our sixteenth assumption

Think how difficult it is to teach children that winning the game matters less than how they participate. How many times have we heard this idea? They don’t believe us; we didn’t believe them. Who lives that way as an adult? Well, I want to find them and play with them! We’d have to do a far better job of instilling the value of playing in every aspect of our lives, if we intend to convey deeply to the next generation the value of play. Can we support a deep satisfaction in getting to play? This value reveals a timeless wonder in getting lost in the playing for its own sake. And in so living, we take up residence in our life in the present moment.

ftrwrd:::21:::nature

With these assumptions threshed out we can proceed to renew our playful nature, and maintain an inner awareness of the spark of creative play that warms the interface of all activities. I extend an invitation to continue the exploration in whatever direction it takes, hoping it expands the sense of this realm.

For some that follows a linear approach through this text and exercises, while for others the path follows a more circuitous path, interconnected with everything else that happens and doesn’t happen along the way. Titrate the experience with an awareness of the flowing energy of life.